To Cara know that I love you

 Today is a Sunday and I am cleaning. So I am dusting pictures all over the house. And what does that mean. It means i see your smiling face in pictures across the country.   I want you to know I try and do stuff to not think about you because it hurts so much. And I fail. Every day of the rest of my life you will be hurting me. I guess thats what you and your mom wanted.  I will always love you and it hurts that you think so many bad things about me. I try and keep a strong face but it is hard. So much where there was no communication.  I love you.. it is all I can say. From what I understand you dont think of me ever so ... this will never be seen,  Always your Dad with love

 So last night you reached out to Erin for the first time in a few months tell her some stuff. I hope you are okay. I do not really pry into what you tell her when you talk to her. I wish I could tell you i love you and miss you and hear the same but I just know that is not the case. Work has been crazy busy and Ive been keeping at it. Last Friday I did 58 miles on the High Bridge Trail State Park. That was a lot of fun. But my old man legs are starting to pay the price for it now. Ive been watching shows and movies a lot as normal. Playing games currently on Amnesia Rebirth and Plague Tale Requiem.   I am hoping to be able to go Columbus in December for Galaxy Con to do photography again. I am also planning my big trip to Peru for my 50th birthday. I have a Passport now. Maybe someday I can see you in Australia. I would love that.  Hope you are well. Maybe next time I will have something super exciting to share. Right now does not seem like it lol